Saturday, May 29, 2010


People will tell you that having cats is a bad thing, and not locking them in at night is the same thing as going out and slaughtering native wildlife willy-nilly yourself. Don’t tell anyone, but I have four cats and I leave the window to the verandah open at night so they can come and go as they please. When it comes to native wildlife I’m told that dogs account for killing more of it than cats, but you know what would really help them survive? Not bulldozing over their habitat and building houses on it. I’m pretty sure that even the brutally efficient killing machines known to me as Moth, Simba, Sam and Grub have killed less lizards in a year than a single Caterpillar.
It’s like than whole carbon accountability thing. Yeah, okay, I’ll stop flying, that’ll help, and meanwhile that smelter down the highway can keep pouring tonnes of smoke into the atmosphere every hour. As though my not flying will make any difference to carbon emissions anyway.
This is your captain speaking. I’m afraid that this flight has been cancelled, because we’ve just received word that Jen will not be joining us. Please return to the terminal, collect your baggage, and go about your normal lives as best you can.
My point is, if my cats were so dangerous to the local native fauna my bread would still be intact.


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