Thursday, August 4, 2011

A dozen posts about possums; or, Closure?

I am hoping that this will be the last post I ever have to write about possums.

I think they've moved on now... I think. I still hear Sid and Nancy cavorting across my roof occasionally -- when you wake up to that crashing sound several times a night for over a year, you can recognise them by their footsteps. Those are my possums, you'll think, and then hate yourself.  At least they're now rampaging around above the roof instead of below it, and I can live with that.

It's been a while since any bread went missing from my kitchen bench. Sure, I've been keeping it hidden in the microwave -- possums can open cupboards, but not microwaves apparently, so I am hopeful that young Johnny Rotten is no longer squeezing in through the shutters to steal food. I haven't noticed any footprints on the bench in a while. 

In fact, it's been so long since any food went missing that today my dog tried to fill the void by stealing an entire bag of chocolates off the kitchen bench. She's a ten year old arthritic Labrador who sometimes can't get up the stairs, but give her the right incentive and she's a contortionist. And I know chocolate is poisonous for dogs, but she seems to be processing it just fine. Also, I'm mostly angry because that was my chocolate. If she wants chocolate she can buy her own, dammit. I am not a charity. 

And just to cheer myself up, here is a picture of a possum's bum disappearing out of the window of my spare room:



May this be the last I see of them!

18 comments:

  1. I’ll actually miss your possums. Or rather, your stories about them. (Do not mail me any.)

    Have you ever thought of covering your roof in mattresses? Okay, so they’ll soak full of rain and crash through your kitchen, but until then, you wouldn’t hear any possums, would you?

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  2. Dark chocolate is the most dangerous type for dogs. And I think it affects smaller dogs more than big breeds so your lab should be fine. Mine stole some toast yesterday morning, and had big 'feeling guilty but not sorry' eyes for the rest of the day.

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  3. My family has had an unusual amount of possum sightings in recent months, and I don't know if it's just because they're city pussums or if that's just how possums are, but they are BOLD! We pulled up to the house and there was on in the front yard and it is just looked at us, like "What do you want?" and then continued to mosey on about it's business in our yard like we weren't even there. Bold! Bold, I tell you!

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  4. Don't be like that, MC! Who else have I got to vent to about my possum dramas? ;)

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  5. Hi Christine,
    It's been a while now and the dog still seems okay. Mind you, she doesn't even have the decency to look guilty. Your dog at least has an almost-conscience!

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  6. Hi Cacy! I will always be eternally grateful that Australian possums do not look like American possums! Those things are like rats on steroids! You can keep em...

    (Ours are just as nonchalant, by the way!)

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  7. Hey, I love your posts about possum butts! When I said "Do not mail me any," I meant possums, not stories. I was afraid you'd send a box full 'cause I missed hearing about them so much.

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  8. I would never be that cruel to you, MC! Lol!

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  9. Good riddance! Er what a shame they moved, such caring tenants those possums. Made you get creative with food and all.

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  10. ...Wow. Stories like these make me glad I live in my boring little country ^^;

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  11. Ah! I never thought that possums would be so intriguing! Although I am sorry that they are being a bother...

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  12. Never met a possum, but when we moved into our current house we had raccoons cavorting around the deck above our bedroom every night. That stopped the moment we got a dog. She is good for something, apparently, as well as being an expert sneak thief :)

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  13. Thanks, Steph, I feel the same!

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  14. But Miss Cole you have badgers! Probably not living in your roof, but you know, living in your country! And they're very cool.

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  15. Thanks, Maggie. I'm hoping it is all behind me now!

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  16. Botanist, your dog sounds like she does a better job than mine! Except maybe in the sneak thief stakes. My dog is a genius sneak thief!

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  17. Jen, I'll miss the possum stories and pictures, too. But I'll gladly do without them, if it means you get all the bed and bread you need.

    Yes, the possums here in the USA are nightmares! I'd rather meet a snake than a possum. And, if you see a possum in the daytime, they stagger and drool and act sick and keel over and twitch. That's to make predators go, none o' that for ME, thanks. Personally, I think they look too ghastly to eat at the best of times, although I know people who claim possum is good meat.

    Ick.

    Marian Allen
    Fantasies, mysteries, comedies, recipes

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  18. Thanks, Marian! God only know what I'll do for blog posts now though!

    American possums are very scary-looking! I don't know that I'd like to eat one either. At least you can't eat Australian possums - protected species. I have no idea why though, since there seems to be about a gazillion of them in my neighbourhood alone.

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